The much-discussed lineup shakeup by manager Jim Leyland was carefully unveiled today underneath a pristine satin sheet. [whoosh] So … that’s weird. His Tildeness was batting DH, with n00b Matt Joyce playing in right. Gary Sheffield, dropped down to sixth, was roving in left while Jacque Jones goes on a top secret assignment mission type scheme in Toledo. Ivan the Stout batted ninth for the first time in 16 years.
Edgar Renteria played shortstop and batted eighth, but only after the umpire quashed Leyland’s idea of having that position be fielded by Ramon Santiago standing on Ryan Raburn’s shoulders.
And it worked for all of three runs. The 6-3 loss puts the Tiger Uppercuts on a four-game losing streak. Tilde? He went 0-for-4 with a walk and a double play grounder. The big shot came from River Thames in a two-out bases loaded pinch-hit situation, because Joyce was due to bat, and this was no time for a kid in his debut to do what men do.
David Ortiz hit an insurance home run off Todd Jones in the ninth. Even though it was a meaningless home run, Francisco Cruceta’s timetable to become the new closer was bumped up a year, to 2013.
Tuesday: Nate, Son of Robert, is in the precocious, precarious and precipitous position of ending the losing streak. Meanwhile, the lineup will face Tim Wakefield. But which lineup, you ask? Well, we’ve obtained a copy:
Laugh now, but Matlock friggin’ owns the knuckler.