It’s not that Jeremy Bonderman hates Magglio Ordoñez and his MVP-confiscating ways. Or Detroit and its game-winning methods. But it sure appears that Bondo isn’t helping either cause. The fleshy righthander only went 1⅓ innings, allowing six runs in a 14-7 loss to the Seattle Marine Biologists.
He’s been, to put it nicely, horrible as of late. His arm must be hurt! No it isn’t, claims Bonderman in Black Knight fashion. **reference #1**
He’ll get his arm checked out this week, and if they find, say, a family of millipedes in his elbow (or something similarly painful), Bondo could be shut down for the year and placed in a cryogenic chamber right next to fellow hurty pitchers Jair “Flurgenyurgen” Jurrjens and Jason “Limp Nostrils” Karnuth.
For Seattle, King Felix Fernandez won the game, despite allowing six runs in five innings. Wait … “King” Felix? Does he really deserve the win, let alone the moniker, with that kind of performance? Strange women in ponds distributing nicknames is no basis for a system of government **reference #2**
The Tigers play a make-up game with the Toronto Blue Jays on Monday. Foundation and mascara sold separately.
As for Tildeberry, R.F.D.:
Sunday’s Game — 2-for-4, 3 RBI, 1 run
YTD — .355, 26 HR, 126 RBI
Yes, Duane Burleson of the AP took such a good photo, and I had to go use my new Photoshop CS3 and ruin it. You hate to see that.