First Placeness, An Update

They, um, took it away. Resume life as normal.

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I Pledge Allegiance, To The Magg…

(Photo by Elsa/Getty Images)

Hey, it’s only glorified spring training, right? What’s the harm of picking the Venezuelan side of Team USA’s upcoming game in the World Baseball Classic? I mean, I know I don’t have a dead soldier for a son, but I’m still within my rights.

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The Añgels?

Oh, hi there. Didn’t see you come in. Were you actually sitting in our beanbag chair this entire time? Sleeping with your eyes open? That’s quite impressive.

Well, not much is going on, just felt it was necessary to tell you that John Morosi is on the goddamn task of making sense out of a good potential trade with the L’Anaheim Angelos for an every day shortstop, catcher, and relief pitcher. But Morosi made a mistake in saying they would perhaps trade His Tildeness. He meant to say Nate Robertson and Gary Sheffield. These mistakes happen, and it’s out of our forgiving nature that we let such glaring errors slide.

So that’s about it. We’ll be back if we have anything else to say. You want a Perrier or video poker game or .. no? You’re good? Okay then.

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WE GET IT.

Who’s Hot, Who’s Not tonight at Chase Field:

Hot: Cliff Lee
Not: Justin Verlander

I vote we discontinue this feature until further notice.

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WHAT HAVE I BECOME?

/sighs

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State of the Tilde

“…the Tigers have a puncher’s chance of being back in this thing by the end of June. If they can pull of a 7-3 homestand and a pair of 4-2 trips after that, then they’ll have completed a 15-7 stretch and will be 39-42 heading into a stretch of 9 division games in July before the All-Star Break.”

So, it worked out a little bit better than that, no? An 8-2 homestand, 4-2 West Coast swing, and a 5-1 homestand later and our Tigers are above .500 for the first time all year. Standing tall at 41-40 at the halfway point of the season, the sins of May have all but been washed away. There’s been a glut of heroes from Marcus Thames’ amazing home run streak to the return of the Sheff. Eddie Bonine throwing a couple of nice performances and Justin Verlander returning to something resembling his old form. Old friends Joel Zumaya and Fernando Rodney came back and struggled at first, but seem to have settled back down. The Todd Jones Experience blew his first save and with it he almost blew the Tigers shot at returning to .500, only to have the Fat Man come through in the end.

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Ch-ch-changes….

Awww, My Tiger, BInge is heading off to the DL today with that nasty oblique strain just refusing to get better.

Taking his place will be our 47th different Mud Hen of the year, catcher Dane Sardinha. Sardinha is hitting .206 and has committed FIVE errors thus far. I’m thinking Pudge is not going to be resting much anytime soon. (Ok, probably still tomorrow since it’s a day game following a night game…)

We won’t discuss what happened last night. We just hope the Little Cat has the cure.

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FAT MAN MAKE SWEEP COME TRUE!

TATER CHIPS FOR ALL!!!

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Working for the Weekend – Garage vs. Grunge

In the first inning of this weekends Tigers/Mariners series, Detroit scored 7 runs. In the last inning of the series, the Tigers scored 4. In between, Team Tilde got shutout (NINE times now…NINE TIMES), went seventeen innings without scoring a run, and managed a grand total of three runs outside the two bookending big innings. To recap:

1. Nate Robertson – Run Support
2. Justin Verlander – No Run Support
3. Jeremy Bonderman – Meh Run Support
4. Zach Miner – Run Support

This is the story of the 2008 Detroit Tigers. They now stand at 24-32, 8 games under .500 (yet again) and, there but by the grace of Tilde, only 6 games out of first place. Next up – three more games on the left coast versus the 2nd place A’s. The Gambler faces off against Rich Harden Monday, some kind of bizarre D-Train/Little Cat HumanAnimalHybrid starts Tuesday against Eveland, and then the bearded one goes up against Duchescherererer to wrap up the west coast swing.

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The Unofficial Deadspin/Official Big Tilde Pants Party – July 12th, 2008

Well, we aren’t quite as organized as those who organized the Deadspin Midwest Pants Party, but we are Tiger fans so you should know better than to have expectations of us by now. So, let’s get on with the details:

Who: Friends of the Tilde and Deadspin commenters who want to travel to Detroit for some strange reason

What: A drunken (if that’s your thing) mob of internet nerds wandering around the Copa with SRO tickets

When: Saturday, July 12th, 3:30pm-ish

Where: Comerica Park

Why: Because The Big Tilde loves you.

So, those are the basics. We’ve already got a crowd of at least a dozen or so ready to show up and we’d love to have more of you. If you have any questions, you can reach me at deadonblog at gmail dot com and I’d be happy to answer your questions to the best of my ability. Also, if you like the Facebook, we’ve got a group here.

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