I-WTF?

 

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Game 93: Well Done, Detroit.

We prepared ourselves for moistness and we got cooked.  Nicely done on averting the rain, Detroit.  Now let’s talk about averting losing…

We’re not sure we can put this on Leyland for leaving Nate Robertson out an inning too long.  We weren’t quite aware of his impending implosion until it happened.  We also believe five runs should be enough to win a Major League Baseball game.  We are comfortable filing this under “Occasionally, ze sheet, she…. howyousay… happens when Nate Robertson pitches.”

However, we will be checking the batteries on Leyland’s mobility scooter today and possibly juicing up its engine so he can get out to the mound faster on his way back to a .500 record.

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Seriously. What the Hell, Detroit?

Saturday Partly sunny through mid morning…then becoming mostly cloudy. A chance of showers and thunderstorms through early afternoon…then showers and thunderstorms likely. Highs 84 to 88…with a heat index around 90. Southwest winds 10 to 20 mph…turning to south…with gusts to 30 mph late. Chance of rain 70 percent.

Don’t make us come all the way over there and kick your butt, Detroit.  We’ll do it.

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Game 82: Audiovisual Recap

In a bit of a rush today; we’re off to see the Tigers today.  At Henry Ford Hospital.  So here’s a moving pictures breakdown of last night’s extravaganza.  First, it started like this:

Then it turned into this:

Finally, we were treated to:

Oh, and a note to Roy Smalley: eat me.  You know how to play the game the right way?  Win.

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A Friendly Reminder from The Big Tilde

Son of Grander = Awesome.  You may return to your business now.

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Optimism, Bitch!

(Duane Burleson of the AP loves showtunes as much as we do.)

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Next Stop: The Neighborhood of Make-Believe

Otherwise known as Lakeland.  We certainly hope it’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood when you arrive, young man.

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A Timely Posting for Tonight’s Game

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We Can’t Feel Our Googles

We were going to do a whole schtick this morning on Jeff Larish as the savior of the Detroit Tigers for hitting his first major league home run and trying to figure out where we could stick the tilde on his name and the Tigers still lost 4-2 but the savior has arrived and all hail the savior and all that.  Tongue firmly in cheek with congrats to Larish for getting his first major trot in.

Then we did a Google Images search for him:

We’re… uhm, we’re going to lie down for awhile.  Yeah.  We’ll be back next week.

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Create Your Own Tigers Game Preview

The Detroit Tigers will try to avoid a sweep at the hands of the                   today at                       as the Tigers take on the                      .                                will take the mound for the Tigers.  He has been universally lousy for the Tigers, sporting a
               ERA that is probably the result of                       .  

At the plate, Tigers hitters will work on their anemic offensive attack.                      told the AP that he spent extra time in the cage today, which he totally expects will work out his offensive woes.                      hopes his                         injury will heal enough to allow him to play.  If not, Brandon Inge will reluctantly take his place in the starting lineup.

After the game, Jim Leyland will pin the loss on                   and then jam a lit cigarette into every exposed orifice.  

This has been your Big Tilde game preview.                               reporting.

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