Zach Miner – The Anti-Tire Fire

Miguel Cabrera: (more…)
Posted in big tilde, BInge, bobby seay, brandon inge, detroit tigers, dingers!, jerkwheat, magglio ordonez, mig tilde, miguel cabrera, tagged big tilde, BInge, detroit tigers, dingers!, Fernando Rodney, mig tilde, miguel cabrera, Ryan Perry, Zach Miner on April 8, 2009 | 1 Comment »
Posted in B.L.O.W.N., big tilde, BInge, brandon inge, detroit tigers, dingers!, Edwin Jackson, enemies of the tilde, jerkwheat, magglio ordonez, oh snap, self-immolation, stop losing you losers, tagged B.L.O.W.N., BInge, blue jays, Edwin Jackson, The Big Tilde on April 7, 2009 | 3 Comments »
It took all of two games for us to introduce you to a concept that we were hoping to avoid. The Brandon Lyon OverWhelming Ninth, henceforth to be known as B.L.O.W.N. – it looks like this:

B.L.O.W.N. caught in the wild
Thankfully, BInge was there to rescue the Tigers in the top of the ninth against B.J. Ryan. (more…)
Posted in big tilde, enemies of the tilde, magglio ordonez, tagged blue jays, MISTER ANDERSON, wag of the tilde on April 7, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
To a couple Toronto Blue Jays fans, for doing their best Tie Domi impersonation by trying to hit Josh Anderson with flying fastballs. Fortunately, because they were drunk and not David Wells, none of them connected.
But I will give them intelligence points for not trying such foolish drinky-toss against His Tildeness. Remember the powder keg that began with the assassination of Archduke Ferdinand? This would have been worse.
I am also deeply disappointed in that I didn’t think of this idea until now, wherein I would dress up as a Jays fan and continue to hurl flotsam and Winnipeg Jetsam into the field of play after the PA announcer threatened a forfeit. Maybe next time.
Posted in actual reporting, big tilde, brandon inge, detroit tigers, dingers!, jerkwheat, magglio ordonez, mig tilde, miguel cabrera, self-immolation, son of grander, tagged Another Painful Way To Start The Season, big tilde, BInge, brandon inge, justin verlander, magglio ordonez, mig tilde, Tire Fire '09 on April 6, 2009 | 1 Comment »
Did you think it was possible that the Tigers could score five runs off of Roy Halladay and still manage to get their ass kicked? Of course you did! It helps when this guy is your starting pitcher:

Rogers Centre crowd watches Justin Verlander warm-up before the game
The Big Tilde went 2/4 with a run scored, the Son of Grander went yard and so did Brandon Inge. The bats weren’t bad tonight at all considering they were facing one of the best starters in the league. Team Venezuela had a strong regular season debut in the middle of the lineup, and the Tiggers need that kind of production this year if they’re going to have a shot at winning the Central. Really, all that’s inexcusable is giving up 12 runs to the Blue Jays.
Edwin Jackson makes his regular season debut for the Tigers tomorrow. Here’s to a better result this time tomorrow.
Posted in big tilde, detroit tigers, jerkwheat, lineup shakeup on April 6, 2009 | 1 Comment »
Oh man oh man oh man!! It’s finally here!

It’s time boys and girls, Game One is upon us. Tigers vs. Jays. Verlander vs. Halladay. (more…)
Posted in big tilde, detroit tigers, jerkwheat, little tildes, shameless commerce division, son of grander on April 1, 2009 | 2 Comments »
As a tribute to both The Big Tilde and our also beloved Son of Grander, The Big Tilde.com is heeding the challenge of #28. 
TheBigTilde.com has pledged $.30 (in honor of The Big Tilde) to Curtis’ GrandKids Foundation for every run that Curtis Granderson scores during the 2009 season. Our money is heading towards supplies for Detroit area schools. I’m also going to chip in an additional $.30 for every run The Big Tilde himself scores.
Please, take the time to make a pledge of your own to the cause.
Posted in detroit tigers, predictions that matter, spring training, suss on April 1, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
• Gary Sheffield to hit his 500th home run for the Long Island Ducks
• Zach Miner will hit 90 on the radar gun, jump for joy, hurt ankle
• Jeremy Bonderman will be suspended 50 games after he tests positive for performance-enhancing Minoxidil
• Dontrelle Willis will go from the 15-day DL to the 60-day DL when it is discovered he suffers from agoraphobia
• Adam Everett will fight Jim Rome when he calls him “Chris”
• A pitch will hit Gerald Laird in the head, denting his helmet. The helmet will then be worn by Placido Polanco, and it will be the most comfortable-fitting headwear he’s ever had
• Brandon Inge will learn that Rob Deer is his long lost father
• Curtis Granderson will launch his own social network
• Eddie Bonine probably won’t do anything
• The Big Tilde: .332, 34 HR, 102 RBI, will be named CEO of GM by May