Archive for July, 2008


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HEY! In the midst of this season of sturm and drang, did you even recognize the fact that I’m hitting .322 and am only .005 away from defending this here batting crown?

/flips hair, holds Silver Slugger Award

After Monday’s disappointment (bleeding over from the weekend’s disappointment), the Tigers bounced back nicely last night in an 8-5 win. The Fernando Rodney Super Happy Fun Time Ride was bouncy, but the job was done. Tonight, we face Cliff Lee. Normally, I am supportive of Clifford as I’ve followed him since he pitched for my beloved Razorbacks. However, since Nate Robertson And The Automatic Four Earned Runs is on the mound tonight, I must wish Mr. Lee a bad night. Preferably at the hands of the man with the flowing locks pictured above.

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There’s no reason to ever grow that again.

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Placido Chokes Up

He still hit .314 that year

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So, we’ve survived what, 60, 65% of the season? I’m a Central grad so I don’t do math real good like. Either way, we’re past the 100 game mark and the bats FINALLY seem to be grooving at the same time. The Tigers are a season-high three games over the break even mark at 52-49. During the Dark Times Without Tilde, our heroes held the line as best they could and pulled out a 7-7 record during the 14 games stretch. Since the return of the Tilde, the Tigers are 5-2 and have no business not being 6-1 (or 7-0) to be perfectly honest. Nate, as much as I love the guy, and I are fighting after last Saturday’s blow up in Ballmer. And the bullpen and I weren’t on much better terms. But, a 3 game stomping of the Royals can put things in perspective and we find ourselves feeling much better about things again. Which is good, because Nate is up again tomorrow against (more…)

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So, it’s been a busy couple of weeks for your Tilde editorial staff. We all returned from Detroit in one piece, but all of us have been horribly busy and it’s always the blogs that suffer when real life interferes. Anyhoo, we’re still alive and kicking in spite of cross-country moves and fire drills at work. State of the Tilde is coming up this evening and we’ll be back to regular posting in the coming days.

In the meantime, enjoy this pleasant four game winning streak which would easily be seven if not for some lovely bullpen work in the city an hour to the north of me. In the meantime, look at these long, loving locks of hair and know that we’re coming back….tonight!

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I, you, me, everybody ♥s The Dugout. Can’t complain. Until their recent Seinfeldian episode:

A couple of things wrong:

(1) Woman? What woman? You mean the reigning AL batting champion? That woman?
(2) Where the fuck’s the tilde? You’d have gotten a pass were it “Elaiñe.” Without it, he looks merely shallow and pedantic.

What they got right:
(3) When Tilde speaks in the Language Of The Gods, it’s difficult to translate that into human tongue, which explains the miniscule number of lines
(4) SaltalamacchiaDehydrated … ok, that? That was good.

I’m naturally assuming their next episode will be an apology/retraction/willful assimilation into The Society And Preservation of the Big Tilde. They just, y’know, haven’t gotten around to it, holed up in AOL corporate conference webinars and such.

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On Sunday, the whole Big Tilde editorial team gathered one last time in person at Comerica – with The Bad One, who provided amazing Champions Club tickets – and the one and only Suss made an off-hand statement while Clete Thomas was batting.

“This would be a great time for Clete to finally homer”

And so, Clete did just that with his next swing. Alas, we cursed Clete, as he is returning to the Mud Hens to free up some roster space for this guy that they are calling up from West Michigan.

In a couple of days, we’ll go into detail about the amazing Detroit Pants Party and we’ll gloss over the fact that the Tigers went 1-2 during the three games I attended. My computer has been getting repaired and I just got it back tonight. Look for the visual evidence of the weekend come tomorrow.

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We prepared ourselves for moistness and we got cooked.  Nicely done on averting the rain, Detroit.  Now let’s talk about averting losing…

We’re not sure we can put this on Leyland for leaving Nate Robertson out an inning too long.  We weren’t quite aware of his impending implosion until it happened.  We also believe five runs should be enough to win a Major League Baseball game.  We are comfortable filing this under “Occasionally, ze sheet, she…. howyousay… happens when Nate Robertson pitches.”

However, we will be checking the batteries on Leyland’s mobility scooter today and possibly juicing up its engine so he can get out to the mound faster on his way back to a .500 record.

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Partly sunny through mid morning…then becoming mostly cloudy. A chance of showers and thunderstorms through early afternoon…then showers and thunderstorms likely. Highs 84 to 88…with a heat index around 90. Southwest winds 10 to 20 mph…turning to south…with gusts to 30 mph late. Chance of rain 70 percent.

Don’t make us come all the way over there and kick your butt, Detroit.  We’ll do it.

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